Billables

I just looked up from my desk and realized that months have passed.  It is now April.  I can’t help but ask–where has the time gone–where have I been all this time?  Have you seen me around at all?  Do I have a glazed look in my eye? 

I’m pretty sure there was a holiday in there somewhere–and I vaguely remember celebrating a birthday at some point.   My eyesight is getting worse–I can’t even see my monitor without my glasses on.  I have a tremendous headache–maybe if I try to stop scrunching up my forehead I’ll feel better.  

The things in my life that should be in sharp focus seem swallowed up in a pea soup blanket of mist.  So…confused. 

And then it hits me.  I keep track of my life somewhere.  I record my time.  Almost every single minute of every single day is catalogued.  I look back.  DTE explains a lot.  I know where I have been.  I’ve been right here.  Billing time.  Working working working. 

Do you find yourself thinking in six minute increments?  Do you find yourself working that much longer to make your hours–even when staying at the office is not an absolute necessity?  What came first–the chicken or the egg?  Are we workaholics by nature or the billable hour the root of all evil?  Can we blame the billable hour on the shameful lack of women partners in law firms?  Hmmmm–can’t make partner unless you bill a certain number of hours every year.  Can we blame the billable hour for the doc review sweatshops so many of our bretheren are experiencing?    I know where my suspicions lie.    I think law students should learn about DTE in law school.  Part of your grade should be determined by how many billable hours you spent studying and working on assignments. 

I just googled “pressure of the billable hour.”  I found a blog called the Blawgraphy that has a great analysis of the billable phenomenon–along with a brief history, as well as some great links.

If the Philadelphia lawyer is having any issues at all–the culprit is the billable hour. 

Come on folks, its Friday night–you shouldn’t be in the office.

 

New Job

I forgot how difficult it is starting a new job.  I barely know where the bathroom is or how the firm document management system works.  I think there is a file room around somewhere…?? The most difficult thing for me right now is figuring out who I am working for.  And I don’t just mean that I don’t know which partners I’ll be working with–I mean–I don’t know their way of doing things.  Do they expect final briefs or is it acceptable to send a work in progress and ask for comments?  Are there any partners that might  get annoyed at me for asking questions?  Which people prefer e-mail to visitors chair chats? I’m hoping I figure it out–and soon.  I just want to achieve some sort of comfort level–  Did I mention that I am exhausted?  This is tiring stuff, folks.  I’m pooped–drained–beat—- But certainly not bested. On second thought–maybe I am bested–I think I’m even too tired for cocktails tonight.

My Second First Year

I feel like a first year associate all over again.

I am going into my fourth year of practice. I was in my second year at my firm when Judge Bernstein asked me to clerk for him. It was the kind of opportunity I could not refuse–even though it involved a substantial pay cut. I had always wanted to clerk at the trial court level–so when the judge called me up, I knew I had to run with it.

My clerkship is now drawing to a close. Whew–this year has really flown by. Even though I do not bill time, or work twelve hour days, or come in on the weekend, this has been a very busy year. The judge keeps me on my toes, let’s just put it that way.

So, I will be starting with a new firm in September. And I have to tell you–I am pretty nervous. I think I am more nervous to start at my new firm than I was at my first firm as a first year. Why? I think it is because I know going in that I know nothing. Sure–at least I know how to write a brief, etc. etc., but I know next to nothing about the daily life in the firm. How will I fit in? What are the firm politics? How can I make sure that I hit the ground running? How can I make sure I don’t make any stupid mistakes? Is there anything else I should worry about that I haven’t even thought about yet? I am only just able to restrain myself from the plaintive query–”will they like me”?

I do know that I have to go back to billing. And I think this might be one thing I am dreading the most. I dread the prospect of working both days on a weekend, consecutive weekends in a row. I dread the burn out. And I really enjoy Thanksgiving with my family, thank you. (Oh, and here is a word of advice to first year associates–even though I know you won’t take it–if work is slow–take advantage of it. Don’t stay at work just for the sake of staying at work. You never know when you might get a breather again.)

Maybe I am just feeling pre race jitters–the kind of feeling I get right before a ten mile race, or that I used to feel before I jumped off the block for a 200 meter butterfly. I know it is going to be long and tough.

But I also know that I am going to be tougher. Maybe now is the time I need to bust out “Eye of the Tiger” and “Chariots of Fire” on my Ipod.

It is ok to be nervous (I keep telling myself). I am visualizing my performance. I am mentally preparing myself for what lies ahead. I am getting ready to give everything I have got.

Good thing I have until September.

Jobby Job (or Strict Scrutiny)

Looking for a new job is one of the most unpleasant experiences I have ever had.   I find the whole process distasteful.  How does one capture a potential employer’s attention in a one page cover letter?  Does my transcript represent my abilities as a lawyer?  Can I please make my resume two pages long?  Am I good enough, am I smart enough…… Do people like me?? 

I had always hoped my potential employer would seek me out instead of the other way around. 

Rejection letters are the worst.  I just got a rejection letter from a job I didn’t even apply for.  I felt like writing back to them to let them know that I didn’t want their stinkin’ job in the first place.