Relationships between white men and an Asian women seem to be not only quite common but also accepted far more than the other interracial relationships. I’ve noticed most Asian women with white men at my undergraduate school, graduate school, and law school as well as the legal community and in my neighborhood.
Many of my Asian women friends and colleagues have told me that they don’t have a preference as to what race they date but that it’s usually white men who ask them out. [This has been my experience as well].
On the other hand, I know quite a few white men who prefer to date only Asian women. Their reasons are always the same. They prefer the Asian looks: straight black hair, slender builds, almond-shaped eyes, and smooth golden skin. They like the culture, the art, and the traditions of Asia. And they say that they find Asian women to be more feminine. Many of my Asian friends and colleagues [jokingly] say that these men have an “Asian fetish” or “yellow fever.”
Recently, I had a couple of conversations on the topic of white men who prefer to date only Asian women. So I looked online for articles and comments concerning this topic. Many of the articles on this topic were somewhat offensive, and many of them just confirmed my belief that certainly there are many men out there with “yellow fever,” whether they want to admit it or not (see, for example: Why White Men Prefer Asian Women and White Boy Speaks on Dating Asian Women.
I then came across an article, Tiny, Flat-Chested and Hairless: A White Man Extols the Wonders of Asian Women. However, like many people who wrote letters to the editor (see Letters), I found this article also to be quite offensive because she implied that men who prefer to date Asian women must be pedophiles. One of the first things that came to my mind when I read this article was that this author (a white woman) must not like Asian women very much (or white men who date Asian women, for that matter), since she exhibited a better-than-thou attitude.
So I got curious about the relations between Asian women and Non-Asian women. And wouldn’t you know it? There was an article exactly on point: Relations Between Asian and Non-Asian Women. The article points out that some white women have negative impressions of Asian women because they see Asian women either as sexual threats (the exotic temptresses/sexual predators stereotype), or objects of pity and condescension (the passive victims of sexist cultures stereotype), or as superhuman competitors for grades and promotions (the grinds-with-no-lives stereotype).
Yes, I know I’ve digressed. But what the heck? They’re just my random thoughts on Asian women, white men, non-Asian women, yellow fever, Asian fetish, and everything in between.
Tags: asians, Dating, interracial
August 23, 2007 at 6:23 pm |
Very interesting ! I have dated several Asian woman and being the
introspective “nut” that I am, I have often asked myself why. Believe it or
not I do not think it is a porn or sex thing per say although, many men do
like smaller frame women.–More maneuverable and they take up less space in bed
Without going into too much useless details I think men in general are attracted to petite woman– and because most Asian woman are petite–bingo you have your answer. My definition of petite is not
overweight and small frame –less than 110 bs. In my opinion the attraction to pettiness is either part of a sub-conscience desire for
(dominant-submissive) or the hero coming to the aid of the damsel in
distress. Both explanations could be a response to the sociological
changes that we have seen in the last 100 years. Such as woman becoming more independent, etc, threatening our historical position of ruling the world–you know the rest of the story. Again this is only my opinion.
I
also strongly differentiate Asian woman. South East Asian vs. Chinese, vs.
Philippine, etc. However with the exception of some areas within northern
China– most Asian woman fit my description of Petite.
I bet if you were to sample single woman between 30 & 40 you would find most of them in the “larger Frame” category. Which should indicate a relevance to my “petite” theory. Overweightness is at epidemic proportions here in the US. Although growing in other parts of the world, Asian woman are typically still petite.
I never heard of a man stating that he will only date Asian woman. Or for
that matter confining himself to only one group.
With me–I have an attraction to foreign women in general. — and of course any woman with a shapely butt:) Which creates a paradox because many Asian women have flat asses. My experience has proved that foreign woman are more “simple.” Less materialistic and more humble. A simple walk in the park or a tour of a museum will suffice for a great day. By the way I am attracted to my American woman also. Except the 60% that are overweight.
August 23, 2007 at 8:11 pm |
I am a white woman who has dated more than one Asian man, but, interestingly, no one seems too phased about this. Well, except my girlfriends who have inquired about one particular feature of my Asian paramours. Just to give a shout out, I haven’t been disappointed. But I’m getting off track… the white woman/asian man combo doesn’t seem as popular or controversial. I guess what might be favored about Asian women (their petite size for example) is not what women are generally looking for in men – perhaps explaining why the reversal isn’t as popular?
August 23, 2007 at 8:24 pm |
You bring up a good point. I think that the media has something to do with the fact that white woman/Asian man combo may not be as popular as the white man/Asian woman combo. I’ve noticed a lot that Asian men generally tend to be portrayed in the media as bad evil guys or sexless nerds.
May 17, 2009 at 3:42 pm |
How about Soul Brother/ Asian woman combo? Too beaucoup?
September 3, 2007 at 11:10 pm |
Maybe the real question is: Why are so many Asian women dating white men?
September 21, 2007 at 6:40 pm |
Considering I found this site because I was curious to know if there was such a thing as an “Asian man fetish”, I’m inclined to agree with “On The Flip Side” and “girlygirl34″. I like Asian men, but I like all guys with dark hair and dark eyes. Judging by my dating history, it would appear that Italians are my preference.
Anyway, you just never hear about it. I wonder if this has more to do with the Freudian idea that women (in general) do not have fetishes at all.
I saw a pretty funny video about this topic once. An young Asian man is wondering why Asian girls will date white guys, but white girls don’t date Asian guys as often. He later finds that it’s because all of the white girls are dating black guys, as is the common stereotype.
October 3, 2007 at 3:01 pm |
do you have copyright permission for these asian-woman-dating-white-men-fetish pictures you posted.
October 3, 2007 at 3:28 pm |
T.P. (a.k.a. Buster), come on. As a lawyer, you should be able to predict what my answer would be.
January 30, 2008 at 12:08 am |
should check this vid out too… pretty cute:
May 26, 2008 at 10:21 am |
its ok to try different flavors but asian girls who just go for white guys or white guys who have the yellow fever its abnormal for the asian girls who date only white is usually because they are ugly to asian standards and the cool asian girls dont want them because they are to picky about the girls looks so the girl turns to the white guys who have a different opinion about whats beautiful in an asian girl, like most asian girls who are with white guys are the real dark slinned ones while asian guys prefer lighter skinned and slim girls
June 22, 2008 at 12:18 am |
go to canada, you will see lots of white/asian couples, not just white man/asian girl…… i’ved seen nerdy asian boy dating nerdy white girl, fat asian guy dating fat white girl etc……
July 3, 2008 at 2:55 am |
This post is strange. I’ve haven’t seen alot of mixing but alot of diversity around towns and stuff. Most men(in this part of the world), I think, tend not to go with asian women, and this begs the question, who will? And in turn, women can only over speculate the drive in men finding a asian women. This answers why you as a woman have brought this up.
November 25, 2008 at 8:20 am |
john peter – 2 words. fuck you.
“In my opinion the attraction to pettiness is either part of a sub-conscience desire for
(dominant-submissive) or the hero coming to the aid of the damsel in
distress. ”
“However with the exception of some areas within northern
China– most Asian woman fit my description of Petite.”
fuckin racist sexist son of a bitch. im sure there’s plenty of you motherfuckers running around town.
December 19, 2008 at 2:57 am |
I have liked Asian women since I was very young and I am not sure why. I remember the films with Nancy Kwan for example and I immediately fell in love with her and watched all the films she was in. Unfortunately when I was growing up and going to school I had little opportunity to meet Asian women so my ideas about them were only gained from what I saw in movies and on television which reinforced the stereotype that Asian women, while beautiful, were also very feminine and generally very devoted to their usually white older male lover or boyfriend. Of course this is a very powerful attraction to any young boy with raging hormones especially when he was surrounded by American girls who were battling notions of woman’s gender roles in the 1960s and 70s due to the gender revolution. Many American women from my generation didn’t know whether they should be a mother, a wife, a partner, a boss, an equal, be devoted to a career etc. and it was very confusing for me at least. I gradually gave up dating American girls and became more and more interested in foreign girls (and eventually married a girl from the middle east). I don’t regret it for one minute. Then I moved to the East Coast later in life and finally met many Asian women at my job, in the area (New York/Northern New Jersey) and in travels to Asia for my job also. And once again my idea that Asian women were more friendly and approachable was generally proven to be true. Definitely there is an age factor at work now as younger Asian, and especially American raised Asian, women are much more like younger women everywhere these days, but somewhat older Asian women are much more family oriented, mature, polite, dedicated to their job, friends, etc.). I have many Asian friends now (men and women) and feel fortunate. I can well understand the lure of Asian women too. One thing I have to add before I finish is that there are “many” exceptions to the rule. I have met many self centered, spoiled, manipulative etc. Asian ladies/girls too so just because someone pretends to fit the stereotype guys have of them they should be “very” careful. Asian women know that many American guys have an Asian fetish or obsession and they know how to take advantage of it. I would especially caution any American male who goes to China these days. Many women in China are just waiting for the chance to latch on to some unsuspecting American male just to get to the US (a female Chinese friend told me this herself). There are many cases where the guy thinks he is getting the love of his life only to be shocked and surprised after a year or so when his “wonderful” wife turns into a mercenary (which she already was) and ends the relationship. So be warned. Yes by and large there are many things that are attractive about Asian women and Asian culture, but people are people too and it is important not to forget that and keep your eyes (ears and heart) wide open when looking for any type of relationship. Still if I did have it to do over again I would probably still marry an Asian or Middle Eastern wife. I did apologize to one American girl years back for telling her this when I was dating my future wife at the time, but she said I was smart. She said then that many American girls were really messed up because their roles were in transition and it would be hard for any American man to deal with this unless he was ready for it. Coming from a very traditional family background I definitely was not ready for the liberated wife (sorry for being a chauvinist, but I guess I am/was). So not all American girls at least put down American guys that like Asian girls. Oh yeah – Brazilian girls are way up their too since I’ve met a few although I don’t know any one who has married one so I’m not sure about the long term issues. I do know several Asian girl/American guy married couples and almost all of them have wonderful relationships and contrary to what you may think the relationships are generally mutually respectful and balanced (and very loving and devoted too). Well this is my 2 cents.
February 8, 2009 at 9:42 pm |
As to the comments regarding the basis for attraction between Western men and Asian women to me it is pretty simple. Based on Heredity and also based on the Media we have been programmed to think that petite, tanned, relatively hairless (except on the head of course) women are desirable. Plus the many films depicting Asian women as quiet, respectful, sensual, supportive, etc. are incredibly powerful subconscious drivers even if they are just stereotypes. We are products of our heredity and our environment. When men and women actually meet, associate, and work (and date) inter-culturally and inter-racially many stereotypes and ideas change or disappear altogether. For me I married a Middle Eastern wife and I am very happy (and lucky). I have worked with and gotten to know many Asian (oriental) ladies over more than 30 years also and they can not and should not be lumped in to some simplistic common bag. Some were sweet and traditional, some are as Western as any American, and some are/were incredibly …. well let’s just say there is bad in every bunch (to be polite). About the “hair” issue with Oriental girls – I knew one girl who “NEVER” shaved her legs and never needed too. Man I’ll bet this would make a lot of women jealous. Finally if some guys like Asian girls (and treat them with respect as they would any other lady) then what’s wrong with that? Some guys like blondes and some don’t. So what? Live and let live.
February 15, 2009 at 7:55 pm |
I’m a white male, 21. I’ve noticed that most posters are saying that men are all over the asian women because they have small bodies.
I can’t speak for every one, but I guess you could call my admirer of asian females. Or you could say I have a fetish, or yellow fever. Sort of annoying, to say I’d choose a woman for the sake of a fetish, as if it were pornography.
But I really cannot for the life of me tell you WHY. The first Asian women I was attracted to were the first Asian women I remember seeing, around the age of 4. Perhaps its not a perfect arguement against a previously noted “they take up less room on the bed” but nothing about my four year old body made me feel like I had better “Manueverability” with an Asian women. I simply thought that asian women were very pretty.
And an another note, a friend of mine, LOVES short women, with small bodies. When looking for a mate that is one of his requirements. They must be short, but he has no interrest in Asian women at all.
Also, about white women and asian men, no one seems to notice because theres no HYSTERIA about it, like there is Asian women, or black men, but I know countless women who are really into Asian men.
The men who say things like “I like Asian women for the shape of their eyes, the way their hair grows, the culture.”
I’m not so sure that is it, or that they even fully understand why they are drawn towards Asains. But saying “I don’t know why”… Well no one buys it.
And another note, I’ve exchanged e-mails and that sort of thing with Asian women from over seas. Japan, Philippines, Malaysia. A lot of the girls like the idea of having a child with colored eyes.
April 9, 2009 at 10:10 am |
I think that it is a very interesting and amusing article. Practically all its main points are true.
April 23, 2009 at 5:31 pm |
its all about race nothing to do with love
Media and history dictated this paring, so in sense asian women become brainwashed into their ” ideal” man and white men are brainwashed into their own oriental fanasty
With increase in these relationships, there has been no increase in asian american civil liberities, rights and null of racism
nuff said
May 13, 2009 at 1:47 am |
The truth:
September 14, 2009 at 4:03 pm |
Ric has pointed out exactly what this about.
white supremacy.
go ahead and roll your eyes white men.
You benefit from it everyday. the white man/lighter skin is the real fetish and everything that comes with it.
Too bad this fleeting fetish for whiteness is just that. Whiteness is recessive and eventually these parings will lead to Asian children down the line, not “white” ones.
December 16, 2009 at 1:28 am |
Nowadays, people concentrate too much on immediate gratification, disregarding the consequences of their actions. “Yellow fever” ultimately has unpleasant consequences, at least for Whites. To learn more, visit http://www.Stormfront.org.
December 16, 2009 at 1:32 am |
I don’t care for asian women. From my experience, they’re gold-digging, materialistic, opportunistic, and cold. Also, fakers, especially in bed. It’s hard to tell what they’re actually thinking – unless you happen to hear them “spilling it out” to their friends, as I did on two separate occasions.
Just my experience.